Lying and dating have always gone together, hand in hand. Don’t ask me why, but most people feel the need to play games and misrepresent themselves, apparently believing this improves their chances. Of course, the opposite is true: one can only lie for so long. I understand the motivation of a criminal trying to deceive an innocent victim. But why would a married person pretending to be single join a dating site? I mean, if they’re looking for illicit encounters, there is no lack of such activity online, with willing participants who don’t ask any questions. Why pretend they are looking for a serious relationship?! Well, they do.

A number of new dating sites have implemented a so-called “honor system”. They are attempting to screen for and turn away the undesirables by requiring subscribers to confirm they are unmarried and have no criminal record. Of course, there is still no way to tell if they are lying, until someone gets burned, and customer service receives a complaint after the fact. Some sites have initiated lawsuits against the users who have lied about their criminal history, and are considering new lawsuits against subscribers who lied about their marital status, just to teach them a lesson and reduce the number of such deceptions. How confident are we that these tactics will succeed? Um … not very.

I don’t expect to come up with answers that dispel the mysteries of the twisted human psyche; many have tried and failed before. I do intend to offer you some free online dating advice backed by personal experience: stick with the tried-and-proven wisdom and trust them only after they’ve proven themselves trustworthy. Don’t expect your date to volunteer every truth about himself. Chances are, a handful of other girls will hear the same lines and fabrications during the course of the same week. You’ll have to do some of your own amateur sleuthing.

Luckily, these days, amateurs like us can get our hands on some pretty sophisticated technologies. All you need is your date’s name or phone number to find out everything there is to know about this person’s background. Sweet! I once used this service to find out a former boyfriend was a convicted child molester, and I never looked at the dating scene the same way. Now, I won’t even consider meeting someone I don’t know without getting to know as much as possible about him first. I certainly hope every single man or woman looking for love will read this article and follow my free online dating advice. Here’s to honest, safe and happy dating experiences.